Thursday, April 30, 2009
Yes, she said, smiling. They look exactly like Barbie. Except they're a different color from my Barbie. And they can move without someone moving their arms and legs for them.
I had switched on just in time for the finalists' questions. Historically, this has always provided a chance for some amusement. The first one fit the stereotype perfectly. She was asked if Health Insurance should be the right of every American. Her response was something to the effect that in politics, it's less important if you're left or right than that you have integrity. Integrity is very important, she said. It was like Tina Fey's impression of Sarah Palin: I'm going to ignore that question and answer this one instead.
Next was Miss California, who waffled when asked about Gay Marriage. Apparently she didn't waffle enough, for her response started a mini-controversy that is still in the news today.
The other two actually gave reasonable answers to their questions. I also decided that they were the two prettiest. I hung around until after the commercial to see them come in last. I thought the contestant who gave the non-answer won, but when I look it up, I see that Miss North Carolina won. The waffler came in second. Miss Arizona, the non-answer-giver, was second-runner-up. I don't remember Miss Carolina's question--perhaps it was before I turned on the show. I've tried Googling for it, but there's only blogging about Miss CA.
It reminded me why I stopped watching beauty contests. They keep not picking the prettiest ones to win.
I was also curious why they bother asking the contestants questions. Is the point of the questions to not pick someone who can give a reasoned response, but to make sure you've selected a spokesperson who will avoid answering any political question no matter how absurd she sounds in her non-response? Without having heard Miss Carolina's Q&A, I can't say.
Friday, April 03, 2009
He played her Sinatra in the Elantra. He maximized his Maxima, bought the ultimate Altima. But even his impressive Impreza failed to impress her.
--You wanna roll in a Corolla? she scoffed.
-Yes, your ass in a Yuris, he insisted.
--Don't cram me in a Camry. I won't sit in a Fit.
--No vice in your Versa. Your Prizm's a prison.
-Wanna Forerunner for foreplay?
--Don't deny me my Denali. Rip my bodice in an Odyssey.
In her Explorer he tore her fedora. He caught his cape in the door of the Escape. But he focussed her in his Focus, ravaged her in a Rav4, humped her in her Hummer, mounted her in her Mountaineer. The priest arrived in his Prius and they were wed. They happily tumbled into their Tundra.
Through the rear-view of her Vue she could see her ex- in her CRX. The tourists in the Taurus waved good-bye.
The slob in the Saab sobbed, Could I date chicks with a Matrix?
The commute's not getting to me. Really. I'm fine.
He looked at us from his Stratus. Our mother drives an Armada.so not a dog was fed
so not a word was said
so not a deal was made
so not a debt was paid
so not a thing happened
in the Sonata
Thursday, April 02, 2009
I thought if I typed it into Google the next day, I'd find mention of it. Didn't get a chance to look until today. Found this.
We'd just been talking about the issue the night before seeing the show.
In your thirties, you find you can't get away with stuff you got away with in your twenties. You're not flexible if you don't stretch regularly. You can hurt yourself if you try things you used to get away with. But you're better in a week or two.
In your forties, the damage lasts for months. Or is permanent.